How to deal with the devils next door?

How to deal with the devils next door?

All of us have come across them at some point. While a lucky few get really nice neighbours, the rest of us have to put up with Mr Know It Alls, Nosy Parkers or Noisy Hellraisers. Here’s how to deal with them

Melissa D’costa

THE NOSY PARKER >> He/she would give international investigative agencies a run for their money. Whether it’s finding out about your timings, your place of work or your love life, the Nosy Parker feels it’s his/her business to butt into your private space and ask you very personal questions with full authority. The best way to deal with them is to be polite, but persistently concise when having a conversation. If you give an inch and let them into your personal space , they will invade it.
THE RUMOUR MILL >> This breed sometimes also masquerades as the Nosy Parker, who may have eavesdropped on conversations, got some of it and spun a yarn to feed the others in the group. In exchange for dope on everyone’s lives, they earn a special place in the gossip gang. Such people continue to prosper doing more damage than good.
POISON IVY >> True to the name, the neighbour who emulates the qualities of this plant will leave you with a nasty experience, if you go by outward appearances. Your Poison Ivy neighbour is sweet poison and is likely to get along with one and all, but this is just a front. Don’t fall for it, it’s best to be wary of people who seem diabetically sweet. Tread with caution around them.
THE BEGGAR IN
DISGUISE >> It could be a bowl of sugar, some veggies, or something else that is missing from their well-stocked kitchen. This neighbour has the moolah, but believes in living on alms and will be at your doorstep, always asking for more. Help once, but if you notice a pattern, be firm and tell a white lie. It’s best to discourage this person before he or she starts looking at your home as a one-stop grocery shop.
MR KNOW IT ALL >> This person is wellversed with all the rules and regulations to create problems for everyone else. To add to that, he or she may have loads of dough/ which earns him/her a prestigious place on the group of (housing society) members, who dictate terms to the rest. Not following the herd can lead to isolation and you being branded a loner or troublemaker. Mr Know It All thinks it is his business to tell you how wrong you are. The best way to deal with him/her is to steer clear; let them continue deluding themselves. Speak only when spoken to and reserve your judgements and comments for when it really matters.
THE TEACHER >> He or she is an encyclopedia of information. However, that will do you little good, because all that information will be used against you in the form of letters dashed to various authorities so that you can be pulled up for the misdeeds you are blissfully ignorant about. In fact, you will come to know about it only when the said authority comes knocking on your doors. Arm yourself with contacts, whether it’s a good lawyer, a cop or an official in the civic committee, who can come to your aid.
NOISY HELLRAISERS >> He/she is known to throw parties almost every night of the week and keep the neighbourhood awake. Arm yourself with earplugs and hope that they move out soon.

Is your neighbour a Nosy Parker?