Things to consider before you introduce your partner to your parents
You've had your share of
infatuation and teenage romance. But when you've found your life partner
and decided you want to settle down in life only with himher, it's
imperative you break the news to your parents at the most appropriate
time, in the most appropriate manner. Love marriages are still looked
down upon in our society, and despite the number of odes we pay to
romance in films and literature, not every family takes it in its stride
when their kid confesses to them that they've found their partner. So,
how do you break the news to them? Here are few tips:
CHOOSE YOUR CONFIDANTE
Though it's advisable to seat your parents together and then tell them about the person you are in love with, it might always not be the safest option. Says Ruchi Arrorra, a PR professional who is set to tie the knot with her long-time boyfriend Ravi Charas, “I'm very close to my mom, and I have never hidden anything from her. So, when it was time for me to tell my parents about the man I'd chosen, I went straight to her. I made her understand why he is the best man for me. My mom understood my point and spoke to my father about my relationship. Though my dad loves me, he was a little taken aback. But because my mother was supportive of me, my dad was also cool with it.“
DON'T SURPRISE YOUR PARENTS
Always make sure you don't spring your partner on your parents, just like that! It's important to give a preamble, and then introduce the person to them. Recalling how her sister introduced her boyfriend to their parents, chef Kavita Samrat says, “We had gone to catch a movie and during the interval, my sister handed us out snacks and out of the blue introduced us to her boyfriend, who was occupying the seat next to us. My parents had no clue how to react. They just smiled and kept to them selves. All hell broke loose at home, and it took my sister almost two months to convince him to meet the guy again.“
FOCUS ON THE `PRESENTATION'
Always talk about the positives of your choice and give an introduction in such a way that your parents don't find a reason to disapprove of himher. If you plan to show a picture of himher, then choose the one in which they look their best -wellgroomed, well-dressed with the right kind of attitude. Says relationship expert Vanitha Rukhaiyya, “ Avoid talking about the negatives when you introduce your partner. Talk about hisher job, the characteristics and what fun they are to be with.The better the picture you paint, the better the chances of your parents liking them.“
BE PREPARED TO ANSWER
As soon as you tell your parents that you are in a relationship, they will have million questions to ask. Vanitha adds, “The questions could be -How do you know himher? Where did you two first meet?
How far have you taken the relationship?
What if we do not accept? You must be ready to answer them all truthfully . They might go into an emotional tangent as well, saying you betrayed their trust by falling in love and the likes. You must handle these questions properly and not over react.Avoid showdown at all cost.“
ASSURE THEM THEIR APPROVAL IS NECESSARY
All parents want and need is the assurance that their kids will be with them always.So, tell them that you need their opinion, an honest one at that, on their choice and the future of your relationship will also depend on their acceptance,“ says Ruchi, “I told my parents clearly that I will continue seeing Ravi if and only if they were happy .But I also told them that I needed solid reasons why they think he is not right for me.When my parents thought about it in peace, they couldn't find anything wrong with my choice.“
when to introduce boyfriend to parents
when to introduce girlfriend to parents
Though it's advisable to seat your parents together and then tell them about the person you are in love with, it might always not be the safest option. Says Ruchi Arrorra, a PR professional who is set to tie the knot with her long-time boyfriend Ravi Charas, “I'm very close to my mom, and I have never hidden anything from her. So, when it was time for me to tell my parents about the man I'd chosen, I went straight to her. I made her understand why he is the best man for me. My mom understood my point and spoke to my father about my relationship. Though my dad loves me, he was a little taken aback. But because my mother was supportive of me, my dad was also cool with it.“
DON'T SURPRISE YOUR PARENTS
Always make sure you don't spring your partner on your parents, just like that! It's important to give a preamble, and then introduce the person to them. Recalling how her sister introduced her boyfriend to their parents, chef Kavita Samrat says, “We had gone to catch a movie and during the interval, my sister handed us out snacks and out of the blue introduced us to her boyfriend, who was occupying the seat next to us. My parents had no clue how to react. They just smiled and kept to them selves. All hell broke loose at home, and it took my sister almost two months to convince him to meet the guy again.“
FOCUS ON THE `PRESENTATION'
Always talk about the positives of your choice and give an introduction in such a way that your parents don't find a reason to disapprove of himher. If you plan to show a picture of himher, then choose the one in which they look their best -wellgroomed, well-dressed with the right kind of attitude. Says relationship expert Vanitha Rukhaiyya, “ Avoid talking about the negatives when you introduce your partner. Talk about hisher job, the characteristics and what fun they are to be with.The better the picture you paint, the better the chances of your parents liking them.“
BE PREPARED TO ANSWER
As soon as you tell your parents that you are in a relationship, they will have million questions to ask. Vanitha adds, “The questions could be -How do you know himher? Where did you two first meet?
How far have you taken the relationship?
What if we do not accept? You must be ready to answer them all truthfully . They might go into an emotional tangent as well, saying you betrayed their trust by falling in love and the likes. You must handle these questions properly and not over react.Avoid showdown at all cost.“
ASSURE THEM THEIR APPROVAL IS NECESSARY
All parents want and need is the assurance that their kids will be with them always.So, tell them that you need their opinion, an honest one at that, on their choice and the future of your relationship will also depend on their acceptance,“ says Ruchi, “I told my parents clearly that I will continue seeing Ravi if and only if they were happy .But I also told them that I needed solid reasons why they think he is not right for me.When my parents thought about it in peace, they couldn't find anything wrong with my choice.“
when to introduce boyfriend to parents
when to introduce girlfriend to parents
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